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Reading oil dipstick

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  • JimBro
    replied
    A man sends his wife to the motor factors. She asks for a "710 cap" for the make and model of the vehicle. The saleswoman was confused and called her boss who immediately collected the relevant part. Both women were confused until the boss got out the cap which had "OIL" stamped on it. He placed the cap on the counter and spun it round so both of them could see the inscription...

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  • gasgas
    replied
    The World's Most Expensive Dip Stick?
    https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Dipstick-...EAAOSwPmhfFXqb

    £846. Including postage.

    Do you think perhaps the dip stick has been put through a 60 degree wash cycle in order to clean the revenue? I see examples like this nearly every time I look at ebay.

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  • gasgas
    replied
    I was in the Volvo dealer today updating my knowledge of the brand. The last Volvo I had was a 740. The salesman showed me this XC60 top of the range. It had a Chrystal gear knob. I asked why does it exist, does it light up at night with a flashing blue LED inside it? No, he said, it's what you get on the Premium model. He told me a load of waffle about keyless entry, push button starting (I told him I had a 1953 Austin A30 with push button starting and it wasn't a £500 extra) and eventually he opened the bonnet. He said 'there's nothing you can do in there' and he was absolutely right. Any workshop job will incur an hour's labour (at £160 an hour I guess) of removing and replacing plastic before you can even see the engine. "Where's the dipstick?" I asked, expecting to see a yellow plastic thing sticking up. "There isn't one, your oil level is shown on the digital LED display". Well, I beg to differ. If the oil level sensor or the wiring or the display is faulty it won't. Just another thing to go wrong. A metal stick with a blob of oil on the end doesn't go wrong.
    I left the dealer totally disenchanted with modern flashy tat. For all I know they might be good cars but I would prefer one with a keyhole in the door that you can at least enter when the electronics have failed. And one where you can see oil on the end of a stick.
    That reminds me of the old joke. Names and gender and nationality have been eliminated to protect the more sensitive people.
    A customer goes into the spares department of a motor dealer.
    "I'd like a litre of engine oil please"
    " Why do you want a litre of engine oil?"
    " There's none showing on my dipstick"
    " Ah well sir that is easily solved. You don't need a litre of oil, you just need a longer dip stick".

    Edit: I've just realised a Very Fundamental Flaw with that top of the range Volvo. There is no keyhole in the door. Your keyless entry key (now there's a misnomer surely?) undoes the car when you approach it. The salesman unlocked the car and then opened the bonnet from inside the car. The engine battery is in the boot, so when I asked what that sticking up thing was in the engine compartment he said that is the remote battery connector for starting the engine. It didn't occur to me then, but if your engine battery is dead, how can it unlock the car so you can undo the bonnet so you can get at the remote starting terminal of the battery?
    Last edited by gasgas; 21-08-2020, 20:54.

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  • llywelyn1984
    replied
    Originally posted by llywelyn1984 View Post
    Interesting info ant!
    Yes mine wanders on my volvo 1.6d (hdi engine).
    Ive just learnt what to expect over time, although interestingly i did overfill a bit on the last change as a result.

    I have also read alot of threads that say oil on pug/citroens on the hdi is much higher than needed to account for the now normal 2 year 20k oil change and that if you fill to the top oil is forced out. No idea if this is true but my engine is covered in oil from the various leaks! keeps the rust at bay i suppose.

    Dont here of many engine failures these days mind.
    Saying that my brother has killed two cars which leaked oil, one in spectacular fashion on the M4. A Mazda MX5 which was leaking from the rocker cover, and a mondeo which just burnt it i think. Poor boy had paid for a new clutch a month or so before on the Mondeo. I did tell did him to top the mondeo right up before he did a motorway run; lightning does strike twice. It was amazing how long both lasted with so little oil in them.

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  • MYKE
    replied
    I was once given a Peugeot 205 Diesel by a friend who's daughter's partner had borrowed it for a time. He had filled it up with oil - literally. to the top of the filler. Consequently once it started and warmed up it wouldn't stop. It was actually running on its own sump oil and the only way to stop it was to put it in gear and stall it. By the time I got it the oil was at the correct level but there was not much left of the glow plugs, so a new set gave me a nice little car which gave good service for the next three years.

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  • llywelyn1984
    replied
    Interesting info ant!
    Yes mine wanders on my volvo 1.6d (hdi engine).
    Ive just learnt what to expect over time, although interestingly i did overfill a bit on the last change as a result.

    I have also read alot of threads that say oil on pug/citroens on the hdi is much higher than needed to account for the now normal 2 year 20k oil change and that if you fill to the top oil is forced out. No idea if this is true but my engine is covered in oil from the various leaks! keeps the rust at bay i suppose.

    Dont here of many engine failures these days mind.

    Leave a comment:


  • ant
    replied
    Just a note on dipping the oil on a Relay, always open the oil filler cap before dipping you'll find the equalized pressure in the engine gives the true oil level, dipping with it shut usually gives a lower reading which may cause you to top up only to find it now reads overfull after the top has been removed to top up!

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  • gasgas
    replied
    Then there is the AES, and the AMS and the ATM. All necessary in a modern motorhome.

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  • Artoo0
    replied
    Deleted.

    I was getting my wires crossed between DPF and EGR!

    I should know better than trying to comment on anything technical.
    Last edited by Artoo0; 02-08-2020, 21:07.

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  • gasgas
    replied
    Just shows you need to hang on to a good garage when you find one. I found one in the middle of nowhere 7 miles from my house. They know how to do welding, they know what 25 thou and 15 thou are for. They also know how to re-interpret the lies that the computer tells. The boss told me the other day that when they do a DPF regen the dense black smoke from burning off all the carbon fills their entire parking yard and the villagers run indoors. Makes you think doesn't it? The DPF reduces pollution in that it collects the carbon from the diesel exhaust so people don't have to breathe it in. Then when it needs cleaning, all the carbon that would have been dispersed into the atmosphere gradually, is dumped in one two minute session. So what is the reduction in carbon emissions? Nothing.

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  • GeeCee
    replied
    Ah, thanks for that very clear information. On checking around 6 times, wiped clean beween, each time I have got the same result. The plastic end of the stick that is thrust into the sump has 2 grooves around it, one for high and one for low oil level. One side of the plastic is smooth but the other side is knurled i.e. has knobbles on it. I have discovered that the oil consistently sticks to the knobbles showing a clear level but on the other side without the knobbles it prefers to smear all the way down the plastic fitting. A little confusing but then I am paranoid about oil level having had a garage wreck my 30,000 mile car engine (car worth £3,500) 4 years ago by forgetting to put oil in it before returning it to me!
    I won't go into the saga except to say they refitted another (wrong type) engine that another garage later claimed had done at least 100,000 miles. And they left the wiring harness laying unclipped on top of the exhaust (honestly) plus the wrong engine mounts allowed the engine/gearbox to rock backwards and forwards 6 inches! The steering box etc. was also wrongly fitted with the wrong bolts. I took all sorts of advice, none of which would reimburse me. The average motorist has absolutely no recourse, even the AA and RAC were not interested without a hefty payment up front.The best advice from a garage was to polish it within an inch of its life and sell it to "We buy any Car". I did that and they bought it and promised they would only sell it at trade and not to an impoverished student. Thanks again for your re-assuring advice.

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  • kernowjon
    replied
    @CeeGee. I think you are incorrect. I’ve had a few vehicles in which the dipstick tube “wanders”. Oil being viscous sticks to the dipstick (there is no oil in the dipstick tube unless you have overfilled). So what you see on the dipstick is accurate. For your info at an oil change the refill is by the dipstick, not measured amount - unless the sump pan is removed there is always some oil left in.
    If the oil filter is changed then after refill by dipstick the engine is run until the oil light goes out - when the filter has refilled, then check and top-up.

    Important checking dipstick - pull out dipstick, wipe clean reinsert dipstick pull out and read. Always wait 5 mins before checking or the reading will be low as oil is still in the top-end!
    Jon

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  • kernowjon
    replied
    GeeCee I think you are incorrect. I’ve had a few vehicles in which the dipstick tube “wanders”. Oil being viscous sticks to the dipstick (there is no oil in the dipstick tube unless you have overfilled). So what you see on the dipstick is accurate. For your info at an oil change the refill is by the dipstick, not measured amount - unless the sump pan is removed there is always some oil left in.
    If the oil filter is changed then after refill by dipstick the engine is run until the oil light goes out - when the filter has refilled, then check and top-up.
    Jon

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  • GeeCee
    started a topic Reading oil dipstick

    Reading oil dipstick

    Does everyone have the same problem as me? With a 2007 R30 2.2 litre turbo diesel, a lovely motor, there appears to be a built in fault. The dipstick tube wanders around the engine. Consequently when you try to read ithe dipstick you simply get the end bit you should read covered in oil from the dipstick touching the sides of the tube. I realise that a garage when servicing has no problem, they just dump all the old engine oil and refill with the appropriate amount in the technical book and job done. Us mere mortals, how do we accurately check the oil level?

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